I Have Reasons

Aug 20, 2022

The slight lull in posts this week will extend to the end of August. I expect to put up two or three randomly but the cause is pretty simple: a number of key events have simply complicated any normalcy to my routines.

A little over two weeks ago I woke up with a knee injury. No clue what happened. I assumed my leg dangled off my bed causing a bit of soreness, which had happened before.

But no.

This one had me limping pretty badly. Using a cane. Which didn’t help much. Ordinary things like getting the trash/recycle receptacles to the road proved excruciating and slow. Major grocery shopping required the use of a motorized sit down cart. Some nights nothing I tried would alleviate the pain when laying down to go to sleep.

Simply resting wasn’t an option as things had to be done and I have no backup plan nor evil lab assistants.

It got worse a few days ago when I slammed the mid-finger of my dominant hand in a car door. Which I’d locked. My initial response was shock. Then the worry: did I lock the keys inside the car? They weren’t in the pants pocket near my free hand.

So I stood there. Yelling ‘Help!’ at the top of my lungs, repeatedly, for more than a minute. Nobody heard me.

I ultimately pulled my pants around so the free hand could reach the opposite pocket, extract the keys, while being extra careful not to drop them. Or I woulda been stuck for hours.

So about 4 minutes after my finger was trapped in the top of the door, it was freed. The angry red dent was deep, to the bone. A tiny bit of blood was evident on both sides of the first knuckle. It looked red and twisted.

I proceeded inside of the friend’s home where I’d gone for a quick visit. I washed the blood off and visited. An hour later, my finger had bounced back, the angry red line was gone, the pain went down to a tolerable level. It was puffy and sore.

Thursday I saw the doc, then went for x-rays. She told me since I’d done nothing to cause the knee injury, she thought it could be arthritis. Color me skeptical, not because of evidence but simply because I want to refuse to have arthritis.

Day three after the door/finger encounter, there’s a pinhead blood blister on one side and a tiny nick on either side. No bruises occurred and swelling’s gone. The pain is 99% gone. It bends normally.

I haven’t see the x-rays of knee or finger so I expect to hear from the doc early next week. Yesterday and today, most of the time, the knee pain has been small enough to toss aside the cane. I’m starting to sleep normally again.

But I still have ducks to get in a row. What would happen if something worse occurred to me? I’ve been extraordinarily lucky with my health all my life but I can’t count on that forever as I’m 5 months shy of 70. My nearest blood family is 90 minutes away and the handful of close local friends aren’t checking in on me: they’re old too and dealing with their own lives. One passed away a couple of weeks ago. I have no desire nor intent to burden any of them with my care, even if something worse happened.

I get out and about for a few hours but most of that is running errands. I’ve had three social opportunities of 3 to 6 hours this summer but have only had a full 24 hours free one day in the past 10 months. I need to get a better Plan B.

My gardening hobby has to be scaled back. I overdid, the extra work of watering and pruning in an overly hot summer is too much. I’m super upset with the new landlord, feeling like he’s taking massive advantage of me and lying to me constantly. As I don’t do conflict and drama well, I’ve thought about breaking all the planters, just tossing them in the trash. His intermittent landscape crew means a backyard that’s overgrown, a potential tick sanctuary. Though I typically take great care of places I live in and have done tens of thousands of dollars of improvements on other landlord properties for over half a century, I don’t want to invest any more time on this guy’s property.

So here I sit, venting a little. Not seeking sympathy or suggestions (unless someone knows how to deter the one rogue squirrel that’s been attacking the potted plants lately). An unexpected outpouring of friend support in December of last year has proven enormously helpful in weathering numerous challenges and setbacks, and I’ve passed some of that forward to friends and strangers alike. So thank you again to the dozen who stepped up then.

I’m not much for self-advocacy. Haven’t been so since my twenties. I just plug along, dealing with all the curves thrown at me, trying to be useful to others. Four relatively minor health events since December have changed my outlook a bit.

So that’s what I’m up to and why I’m taking a partial August break from the newsletter. Congress and SCOTUS are in recess, the news cycle’s slowed and though I find things daily worth mention, I expect September and beyond to be far more crucial for citizen participation.

I’m just catching my breath here. At the doc’s office on Thursday, my BP was 118 over 62 so I’m fine. Till the next time the landlord decides to show up.

Found the perfect accompaniment for my Have A Cow planter.

Ever hear of a succulent called Elephant Bush? It’s a favorite food of elephants so that’s why. Hear it sits in a milk glass pedestal bowl that’s worth $20-$30 if the bush gets transplanted out and it gets a simple washing. I want $15 for it, so the buyer gets a deal. Plus the elephant.