The War on Christmas, v. 2022, Part 1 of 4
Memes and carols abound
Not a lot of my own original material today. I give credit to the creators in each case if I can locate them. A meme created by me will always have a ‘GardenKind’ mark or an older one may be signed ‘Zunni Daiz’. All credit goes to the other creators and musicians.
On November 1st, as the stores dumped their vast pallets of pumpkin spices for candy cane decor, a thought crossed my mind.
I was deeply disturbed. From childhood. I suffered from PSTD (Pumpkin Spice Trauma Disorder). I ran out of the store, determined to find Thanksgiving first, which I covered in the last episode.
Upon completion of that holiday, I was ready for the next. I began thinking about how a young couple found no room at any local AirBNB so they sought shelter in, essentially, a barn.
Then another thought crossed my mind.
And another.
That angel I heard. Was he high or wut?
My disturbed grew deeper…
So I busied myself with the outdoor decorations.
It was calming. Then I got the box of outdoor light strings. and began to hang them. That didn’t go as smoothly as I’d hoped, but it’ll have to do…
I began humming O Christmas Tree as I tackled the tree beside the front door.
I refused to surrender my Christmas cheer though. I headed inside my place at Nakatomi Plaza, to get the interior decorations in order. As I’m a scientist, I picked out a proper Chemist tree.
I set up the jetivity scene.
Then I headed down to my favorite department store to buy presents. And that’s when it began. Sears was gone. In its place was something called a SuperCenter. I never knew Bill Russell even had a store.
I began wandering through. As I rounded the corner and headed into the photo dept, I witnessed the first shot fired.
Horrified, I fled.
As I went out the front door there was another Santa, ringing a bell. He yelled ‘Happy holidays!”
I screamed “Don’t you dare take the Christ out of Christmas, you godless liberal!” and covered my ears. I’d heard enough.
I raced home, kicked off my mukluks and made some hot cocoa. Got the remote and looked for a nice old Christmas story on the Hallmark Channel.
Grrrrr, why mess with success? I shut off the TV and went for a walk in my rural neighborhood. It had snowed the night before.
I was amazed to find this Snow Quilt created by artist Simon Beck.
All the tough moments of the day melted away so I returned home.
I poured myself a nice brandy & nog, settled into my easy chair and went back to the Hallmark Channel.
Quietly cursing those godless Hollywood Jews, I shut off the TV, poured a double shot of brandy, straight. I downed that and headed to bed. Little did I suspect what would come next…